What Do You Say To Someone Who Has Cancer – I recently read an interview about cancer patients that dates back to the 1980s. It covered various aspects of the invisible process that a cancer survivor goes through, which is unknown to us. But the highlight of that 10 page interaction was- Need of emotional support for cancer patients. While talking about the importance of supporting a loved one with cancer, I wondered how you can extend your support to someone with cancer.
February 4 is marked as World Cancer Day. Every year Worldcancerday.org runs a campaign with a specific theme for a particular year. This year the theme is I am and I will. This promotes the mantra that together, all our actions matter, They are important to make a change, create awareness, and develop a stronger supportive community for cancer warriors. Therefore, we are contributing our part by sharing this write-up with you.
What Do You Say To Someone Who Has Cancer
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Before you are ready to support a friend with cancer, you must first be mentally ready to make it work. To prepare yourself to help someone with cancer, we share with you a mini-guide.
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1. Be informed: Be well informed about the diagnosis of your friend or loved one. Also be correctly informed about the condition. Communicating with them about their health condition will make them feel like you care about them. Also, if they are not comfortable sharing or talking about the same, don’t push them.
2. Work on your feelings: The news of diagnosis can also be difficult for you. Take your time to process these overwhelming feelings, acknowledge them and work through them before meeting your loved ones. This will help you become stronger to face them and support them.
3. Step into their shoes: While you may not be able to feel exactly what they are going through, you can still process what being sick and sick feels like. Recognize that they will go to even more intense physical and emotional processes. So be there for them and lift their spirits instead of commenting on their physical or mental state.
Now that you are emotionally and mentally ready to meet your friend and offer your help to her, here are five ways for you to work on it.
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Saying that you will be there for them or that you are just a ping away are not concrete ways of giving help to someone with cancer. You really have to be there for them when they need you. Ask them how you can help them. Maybe they want to get some help with errands or get your business on the way to appointments.
Keep checking in with your loved ones to reassure them that they are not alone and that they are supported with a strong support system. You can leave them a message, call them, or be at their door. Whatever you do to stay in touch with them and make sure they’re doing well, remember three things:
Yes, your loved one has been diagnosed with cancer, but that is not the only area of their life right now. Talk about things other than cancer. This will be a healthy distraction for them. You can talk to them about their interests, hobbies, plans for the weekend, and other such things. Don’t limit their life to their health status. They also look for general communication, have the same with them.
Do not deny the diagnosis or feelings of your friends. We understand that in some cases misdiagnosis of cancer also takes place and you would hope for the same for your loved ones.
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But, make sure you subtly communicate the idea of taking a second opinion. Denial can lead to a delay in treatment which can increase the risk for the person. Therefore, make sure that your reasons behind a second opinion are valid and not just false hope.
In addition to the ways to support someone with cancer discussed above, here are some Do’s and Don’ts for you to keep a check.
When a friend or family member has cancer, it’s hard to know what to say. Sometimes our words can translate to a completely different meaning, making an individual feel overwhelmed. Although, that will not be our intention in the first place, our words leave an impact on them. Therefore, it is crucial to choose the right words, connect with them and offer warmth. We share with you a guide that will improve your communication with your loved one who has been diagnosed with cancer.
Gifting is a subtle gesture that shows that you care for the other person. If youare ready to show this gesture to a friend or family member who has recently been diagnosed with cancer, you can refer to the list that we share with you.
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A novel, a positivity plant, a motivational book, aroma diffuser, a mental health DIY kit, fidget toys, stress-busting items, a card, a journal, a video message from loved ones, balloons, their favorite food, a CD with his favorite movies or documentaries, or even a big warm hug will do.
The first thing you can do to help your friend is by loving him and wanting him just as he/she was before the chemo. After chemo, their physical activities and interaction with the outside world may be limited, so support them, be there for them from shopping to appointments. They will need you the most then. And please at all costs do not compare her treatment and recovery journey to others, no two cancers and treatment are the same.
You can motivate a friend with cancer through your words and actions. Using the appropriate words helps them feel understood and loved no matter what their medical condition is. And your actions will fulfill those words. Instead of just saying, “If you need help with something, ping me” be there when they need you and help them out. You can also share encouraging stories with them (with positive endings). Apart from it, don’t make them feel indifferent, stand tall with them.
Are these ways to help someone with a loved one with cancer do not do and easy. Why not make it a part of your lifestyle now!
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And not just this February 4th, but every day of your life work on your actions – big and small, make lasting, positive change. Because your one act can act as the tree of hope for someone fighting cancer.
Looking for more help supporting someone with cancer? Ask your questions at info@ and we will get back to you.
Anjali Singh is a Content Curator in the field of Mental Health. She is currently doing Ph.D. in Psychology. Her goal is to light up the world with positive vibes through her words, her idea of life is ‘Grow through what you go through’. Apart from this, she is a big-time pet lover. A year ago I had a miscarriage and it forever changed my life. It’s not something I ever knew was so common and I also thought it would ever happen to me. However, 1 in 4 women are likely to experience a miscarriage. That is a SHOCKING statistic and so the more we know, the more we can help each other. I never wanted to be apart of that statistic, but I am and I learned a lot about myself as well as how others deal with grief in the process. I want to continue to share my story in hopes that it helps heal myself and others. Knowing what to say when someone has a miscarriage is super helpful because most people brush it off and let me tell you that a miscarriage is hard, and the last thing anyone needs is to be told “at least you got pregnant” when they mourn the loss of not only their baby, but what their future might have been.
Here we are a year later after my miscarriage and my life has changed forever. Last year on March 31, I wasn’t sure how I was going to get through it. However, I have become stronger, have set firmer boundaries and truly have less time for people who weren’t able to see me when I was at my lowest. I have also learned how to talk to others who are experiencing grief. I’m not an expert and I still have work to do, but I thought I’d share my story from the past year and what I think is helpful to say or not say might be helpful to even one person so you too support can show that 1 in 4 person in your life.
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